Letters from Blushes 12
Dear Sir,
Congratulations on your excellent magazine. It’s great to
see attractive young women with good, firm womanly bottoms — and getting them
up well. You know that bottom presentation is fundamental to success. You also
know the only true context: the bum doesn’t belong to them, but to the man —
and there’s never an hour or moment when it shouldn’t be bared and tanned.
I would be very interested to know whether most men agree with me that the small blonde in What Bottoms Are For is the best spankee and canee that I have ever seen. Please use her for your next video. As much as I liked the concept, I just wanted to see her firstly, spanked harder, slippered as hard as at school and caned in the toes-touching position. I have no idea how much these women are paid — it is obviously not my business — yet as a buyer, may I say that I would pay £100 to see that particular young lady punished for the whole hour. You had an excellent letter recently which you published to your great credit that what we men want to see is simply one servile young woman, already perfectly-trained, taken through a synthesis of bottom beating and submissiveness. I was just longing to see the small blonde caned, really caned; with this concept there is just one master who radiates domination with real contempt for the woman, who is precise and whose tone leaves her without a scrap of will-power. The whole hour is just bottom beating a delectable, pathetic, wide-eyed, petite, blonde, naive and above-all thoroughly-undeserving-of-sympathy big girl, that small one in What Bottoms Are For being the epitome. She looked beautiful over his lap; do most agree with me that the man should be three times bigger than the girl? He had her over his lap like a silly little undergrown adolescent; yet the obedience is sadly missing, such as in Sally’s First Lesson. I would dearly like to see a Second Lesson with that man (who was superb, unsurpassable) and the little blonde miss with nothing going for her but her attractive, simple face, blonde hair and a lovely firm, round bottom that should never be white for long.
In conclusion, I would like to say that I have spanked my
wife much harder than your girls are in the videos and she has never cried at
all. She has a better bum than them but that is not the reason. Can’t you ask
that little blonde to take a long, real, sound spanking, then caning in a good
atmosphere (as in Sally’s First Lesson) for more money than she has
ever earned? She would be superb touching her toes in a schoolgirl uniform by
Sally’s master. Do you remember that brilliant scene in The Best House
in Town? I have never seen any video with such a beautifully warm,
secluded, decorated room. There are a whole range of canes and paddles and
slippers that are just made for the bottom of the blonde twit in What
Bottoms Are For.
The only disagreement that I have with your so-informed
letter-writer is that a thorough internal examination fits in delightfully with
bum-walloping, in my opinion. All women are very vulnerable to infection
because of the delicate balance in their vaginas of micro-organisms, yeast and
bacteria — and especially little tarts like our blonde miss. There are four
basic positions: heels to buttocks; hands around knees; knees of either side of
face; and bottom up on the couch for a meticulous examination. Failure to clean
(positions are assumed like clockwork for fear of twelve of the best) results
in touching her toes for two dozen. (They can be spaced out if she is still
adjusting to real punishment of her bottom).
Best wishes and please, please keep training that little
blonde. Bend it over.
A. Saxon, Surrey.
Dear Sir,
I recently bought Blushes No. 10 which
confirmed my opinion that at present you are publishing better pictures than
anyone else. Your fiction isn’t always quite so good. Please find some more
writers who can provide fiction as realistic and satisfying as your
photographs.
Speaking of which, I particularly liked the final picture, the luscious brunette in the skin-tight shorts, over the trestle. It really gives the impression of having been taken part way through a thrashing, one feels that marvellous bottom is already roasting after the first few strokes and she isn’t at all looking forward to the remainder!
Although I’ve a fair length of CP experience behind me, I’ve
never whipped a girl wearing punishment shorts, but I do know a girl who’s well
aware what it feels like to have her bottom burning inside something very
similar. Well, perhaps ‘girl’ is none too accurate — Molly is a lushly-curved
married lady of thirty. I met her and her husband Paul a couple of years ago,
through a mutual friend who knew about our common interest in CP. They’re a
great couple and we’ve become very good friends. Molly gets walloped frequently
and thoroughly, though not, alas, by me to any great extent. If I’d met them
while I was still married we might have set up a disciplinary foursome, except
that CP never had the slightest appeal for my wife. As it is, my divorce was
five years back, and I can hardly see myself tracing down dear Ruth to her lair
in Hemel Hempstead and inviting her to meet my friends so that she can have her
bottom tanned. The suggestion wouldn’t go down too well. So Molly’s real
punishments are left to Paul, though I am sometimes allowed to invent an excuse
to put Molly across my knee and give her an ostensibly playful spanking on the
seat of her skirt. Molly, bless her good-natured heart, puts on a fine dramatic
performance for me on these occasions, wriggling, kicking, squealing, begging
me to stop, pretending to be deeply shocked at the indignity. Of course I know
it’s mostly play-acting but I enjoy it very much, as I enjoy the feeling of her
plump bottom quivering under my hand, even through two or three layers of
fabric.
At any time, Molly is happy to talk to me with great
frankness and detail about the hidings she gets from Paul. Partly, I suppose,
because it’s a subject she can’t very well discuss with her other friends. She
also, rather mischievously, likes to tease me and make me envious by describing
punishments which I can only share vicariously. She knows very well what effect
it has on me when she says something like, ‘Christ, I can hardly bear to sit
down today! Paul gave me hell last night — I was crying my
eyes out!’ One of the punishments she receives quite often is a ‘double six’,
that is, six strokes of the cane and six with the tawse, laid on alternately so
that each cane stroke lands across a broad red stripe already stinging
ferociously from the impact of the leather. The twelve strokes are spaced out
over a period of about five minutes, and Molly says ruefully that five minutes
can seem a very long time indeed when she’s squirming and sobbing over the end
of the bed with her blazing bottom receiving a thrashing guaranteed to make a
naughty lady repent of any sins she’s ever committed.
Sometimes she gets it on the bare bottom, sometimes, by way
of variety, she has to wear her punishment pants. These are a pair of thin,
well-worn white cotton jeans which have shrunk with time and washing so that it
takes a fair amount of tugging and wriggling before her delectable buttocks are
snugly covered. Part of the legs are cut off, so they finish at mid-length.
Molly once put them on to show me, and they really are drum-tight, even before
she bends over. Molly assures me that the cane and strap sting at least as
painfully on the seat of her pants as on the bare bottom and that the
after-effects are even more uncomfortable than when she is uncovered. She is
made to keep the pants on for at least an hour after punishment, and of course
her bottom is swollen and the throbbing weals are pressed tightly against the
taut cotton. Molly confesses that she pleads abjectly to be allowed to take the
pants off before the hour is up but she’s never allowed to, and all she can do
is lie face down on the bed with the furnace in her lovely rump making the
tears pour down her face. I’ve told her about a magazine letter I once read —
fact or fantasy, I’ve no way of knowing — from an American lady describing her
experiences as a hairdresser’s assistant when she was younger. Apparently the
manageress of the salon disciplined her young employees with the back of a
hairbrush, and she insisted that the girls should always wear a girdle. This
was rolled down for a very thorough spanking and afterwards the girl had to
replace it to compress her scorching seat. Pretty much the same idea, really.
I liked the letter from the reader who classified girls as ‘spankable’ or ‘whippable’. A man after my own heart! I’ve spent many a happy hour just watching the girls go by and privately deciding what type of punishment would be most effective for each shapely seat. On the whole I agree with his conclusions, though I’m not sure that the morality of the girls should come into it. Spankings for virgins and canings for tarts seems an unnecessary limitation. I think each individual case has to be decided on its own merits, taking into account physique, demeanour, behaviour, dress, and any other criteria which may occur.
The subject of celebrity punishments has cropped up in your
columns once or twice. It might make an amusing contest if readers were invited
to suggest appropriate punishments for half-a-dozen well known young ladies.
Off the top of my head, I suggest Bonnie Langford, Anneka Rice, Wincey Willis.
(There’s an evocative name!) Catherine Bach from the Dukes of Hazzard, the new
breakfast girl, Debbie Greenwood, and Floella Benjamin.
D Ericson
R.S.V.P.
A second piece from the lady writer of A Splitting Moment [Readers will remember the photo of her as a girl] which
we published with the letter elicited from her by John Hotten our R.S.V.P.
researcher.
You may remember me telling you about some of my experiences
at Beechcroft Boarding School for Girls and how one of the girls got the cane
so hard across her knickers that her knickers split right across the middle…
Well this was quite an eyeful especially in front of the whole class and it was
the topic for conversation for quite some while as you can imagine. It was
certainly a sign for all of us to wear substantial winter-type knickers
especially when attending Miss Hart’s lessons, needless to say I can tell you
that it didn’t take much to get Margaret Parsons to agree to this idea after
having her bare bum displayed to all the class and also actually getting the
cane stroke across her bare bum-cheeks!! Obviously we were careful not to play
around much during lessons for history… Not with Miss Hart in charge!!
However, a few weeks later I had the most awful shock when I
got to her class, as one of the questions that we had been given to do at night
for ‘homework’ I had completely forgotten to do, and we had to hand our book in
at the end of the lesson! As I had only put the question down in pencil, I hit
on the idea of rubbing it out, I thought that I could tell her that I didn’t
know about it! It seemed a good idea at the time so during the lesson I took
the opportunity to erase the beastly question, at least it gave me a few days
grace to think up some good excuse for not putting it down in the first place…
Anyway I didn’t really think too much about it again as you
know how things are… Out of sight out of mind! On the following Monday we were
in her class again and I suddenly remembered about it when she got the prep
books out to go through (there were about twenty in our class). She would
normally spend a couple of minutes explaining the answers that were not right
and girls had to do them out again, I thought she would never get to mine (I
wanted to get it over with). In fact she went through every other book first
and I really thought she had missed me out altogether… But alas NO!!… ’Now
we come to Paula Staples,’ she said and there was quite a long pause. ‘The
difficult question about the Roman Empire, Miss Staples would have us believe
that no such question was given!!’ she said in a sarcastic tone. ‘However I
believe differently as I have discovered that this naughty lazy girl has
actually rubbed out the question from her book… But not well enough I fear as I
am not a complete idiot!!’
‘STAND UP GIRL,’ she shouted… I rose reluctantly to my feet.
‘Do you think that I am so old as to not to notice the impression in your book?
On the contrary with my long experience the older I get the more I know what to
look for!’ ‘Please Miss it was a genuine mistake,’ I prattled. ‘Genuine I
doubt, but mistake it most certainly was!!’ she said ‘As will be proved inside
the next few minutes during which I shall be warming your bottom… GET OUT HERE
you lazy little time-waster!’ she pointed to the ground where I guess I was
supposed to stand… I remember thinking… crikey, good job I put my thick
navy-blues on!… As I was quite short she made me stand on the platform in front
of her desk so that the rest of the class would be able to get a good view,
this was of course all part of the humiliation. She put several books on the
front of the desk and ordered me to bend over the desk with the books under my
body in order to raise my bum in the air, my bottom was sticking right up and
my feet were hardly touching the ground, she shuffled around and I could see
her selecting a suitable instrument though I didn’t see what it was.
‘Now we had a little accident last time didn’t we girls?’
she said to the class… ‘Yes Miss,’ they all chanted. ‘Now we don’t want that to
happen again do we?’… ‘No Miss,’ they chorused… oh thank goodness I thought,
she must be using the slipper or the paddle at the worst and with my thick
knickers on it shouldn’t be too bad… Miss Hart rambled on ‘And although Miss
Staples appears to be wearing quite a substantial pair of regulation knickers,
I fear that I shouldn’t take the risk of damaging them too much and I intend to
use the thin stinging whippy cane… she paused a moment to allow that to sink
in, my heart sank, I couldn’t understand what she was getting at because that
cane would be the worst for ripping knickers apart!
‘SO Paula I shall have to tell you to take your knickers
down!!!’ Wow what a terrible shock I got, I stood up and pleaded to her ‘OH
Madam PLEASE NO, I would rather have twenty with my knickers on… I… I don’t
mind paying for them if they split.’ She laughed at me. ‘You girl have caused a
lot of trouble in the past and it is high time that you were thoroughly
disciplined for not only this misdemeanour but to make up for other times when
I have been too lenient with you… KNICKERS DOWN TO YOUR KNEES PLEASE!!!’
Well I certainly couldn’t recall any times that she had let
me off but she certainly was not going to let me off lightly this time! I
looked at her sideways as I put my hands up my skirt and took hold of the
elastic top of my navy knickers, I was hoping that she was just trying to
frighten me but all she said was ‘COME ON!! COME ON. Hurry child let’s get on
with it!!!’ I had my knickers just clear of my bottom and I moved back to the
desk again… ‘TO YOUR KNEES GIRL!’ she bellowed and she thrashed the cane across
my bare thighs. Wow how it stung and I quickly got them down as requested and I
got over the desk again. I had a fairly good length skirt so my bottom was
still covered but for how long?
Miss Hart was doing her fly catching act again swishing the
cane about — the thin cane made a terrifying whine as it swished. I felt her
fumbling with my skirt and the cool air on my buttocks as my bum was uncovered
and presented completely bare for all the class to see. I could hear a
shuffling of chairs and I knew that all their eyes were on my bottom, some of
the little bitches were probably standing up to get a better view!… Why did she
have to swish that damn cane, you could never tell whether or not if it was
going to land on your bum… SUDDENLY the penetrating sting bit hard into my bare
flesh, I screamed out in pain and my whole body vibrated, it cut me full in the
centre of my bum with a noisy SPANK!! which sounded distant to
me for my mind was occupied in coping with the pain!… SWISH STING!!
The second devastating stroke followed almost immediately
and before I had any time to recover or compose myself, it landed almost in the
same place and I felt the end of the cane whip around my backside and flip deep
into my right bum-cheek… OOWWW OOOWWW OW! I screamed. I gripped on to the desk
hard expecting another thrash as I heard the whistle of the cane through the
air but this was Miss Hart’s sadistic ruse, she was keeping me in suspense
again. I could still feel the painful sting of those strokes and a burning
sensation from what must have been two sizeable weals across my bottom. The
swishing went on and my buttocks tensed for each swish to prepare for that
biting sting anticipated.
I could hear a murmur around the class and tutting and low
whistles… ‘Quiet girls please,’ shouted the Mistress, ‘and pay close attention
to this naughty girl’s bottom and learn a lesson from what you see!!!’ There
was almost total silence now and I just waited helplessly as the wicked old
bitch taunted me trying to catch me unawares, my buttocks were permanently
clenched tightly together I could feel my whole body tremble with fear.
Suddenly a loud whining swish broke the silence… The cane made
sharp contact with the lower part of my bum with a piercing crack! I squealed
and cried out for mercy. Another really hard stroke landed whipping deep into
my buttocks before I had a chance to tense myself; the intense pain shot
through my behind like an electric shock causing me to lose complete control,
my feet left the ground and I can remember kicking them about and rubbing my
bottom cheeks to reduce the pain…
Miss Hart took the opportunity to place yet another
follow-up stroke thrashing the cruel cane hard down across my bum and catching
me on the back of my hand… ‘HANDS OUT OF THE WAY!!!’ she screamed ‘You’ll get
an extra one for that!’ My eyes were glazed with tears and though I usually
tried to put on a brave show in front of the other girls, I couldn’t hold back
a few sobs. ‘Stop snivelling girl you have another two to go yet’, she ran her
hand over my bare bum, ‘HA, you’ll remember this won’t you child?’ she took a
handful of my left bum-cheek and squeezed it tight in her strong hand and
brought the cane down hard THWACK!!! on my right buttock thus
spreading my fiery globes which must have been very revealing to the onlookers
though I was almost past caring about that…
‘Well that’s six and now you’re going to get that extra one
for putting your hand over your bottom… I think we’ll have you right up on the
desk for this one,’ she said. ‘Take your knickers right off and move the books
and kneel on top of my desk!!’ I took off my knickers, still sobbing. I glanced
at the class of open-mouthed wide eyed girls, some of the little bitches were
obviously enjoying it immensely. I tried to leap on to the desk but slipped and
sprawled on to the floor. I began to cry out loud. ‘Silence girl,’ snapped Miss
Hart as she cut the cane across the back of my legs, some of the girls even
laughed (I wish I knew who they were). I scrambled up quickly on to the top of
the desk, moving the books to one side I kneeled ready for the last stroke…
Miss Hart approached the desk and moved my knees well apart and then told me to
stick my bottom well up in the air, I tried to do this as discreetly as
possible as it was so embarrassing for me exposed to all my classmates but Miss
Hart had no compassion and kept insisting ‘Protrude your bottom more Staples!!’
she ordered. I had no choice and I was well past caring anyway, I wanted so
dearly to get it over with that I would do anything just to get back to my room
and soothe my sore buttocks with cold cream, so I thought ‘to blazes with those
bitchy girls’ and I did as I was ordered and I stuck out my bare bum as far as
I could, it didn’t bother me any more what they could see…
‘That’s better,’ said the Mistress, ‘What do you think
girls?’ the nasty little swines giggled, I glanced over my shoulder now and
could see some of the girls and also saw Miss Hart swishing the cane and saw
her stand back to take her powerful swing at my naked bum, my buttocks were
well protruded and consequently quite firm. The cane spanked across them with a
stinging stroke SPANK!! I felt the end of it double round and
flick across my right thigh AAGHHH!! OOOWWW OOWWW! It really hurt but somehow I
don’t think it was quite as bad as some of the other thrashes from the cane I’d
had earlier, maybe because my buttocks were much firmer in this position or
maybe it was the last stroke or maybe I’d even got a bit used to it. But I’ll
tell you this, I had a very sore bum but you couldn’t see my backside for dust
when she told me I could go!!!
Dear Sir,
I would be interested in sharing some of my ideas and
experiences on corporal punishment for your publication. I would not like my
name published for obvious reasons but I think it is a shame that the strict
punishment that we were brought up with seems to be dying out.
I am retired now but as a teacher in the 50’s, I am pleased
to say many unruly teenagers felt my strap. Even then there were rules about
corporal punishment, for instance how many strokes, and the presence of another
teacher if a girl was to be punished, but as a parent of two girls (now grown
up of course), I was not frightened to spank their bottoms when they were
younger, and then strap or cane them until well into their teens, and they
thanked me for it.
Yours
J T Kent
Dear Sir,
I believe the presentation of a bottom prior to a caning is
of great importance — a partially covered one enhances the beauty of the
buttocks.
The girl to be caned must have a wardrobe of clothes to
choose from. We can observe her from behind a mirror as she sifts through her
bottom drawer looking for the right pair of panties. Low angle-poise mirrors
are situated around the room so as her bottom is seen from every angle. She
selects different panties and tries them on pulling them up as tight as
possible as she knows this is how she is to be presented. She inspects herself
in the mirrors and settles for a black pair, she pulls them on and reaches down
for a pair of high heels. Bending over she slips them on. She is nearly ready
for a caning, she rings a bell which advises the man watching from behind a
mirror that she is prepared. She sits facing a chair back with her bottom over
the edge. She grips her panties wrenching them upwards seeing herself reflected
in the mirrors. There is also a mirror on the floor beneath her bottom. A man
appears with a cane, she looks around helplessly over her shoulder. After a
couple of whacks he is not satisfied with the tension in her panties, the
material must clear the buttocks completely. He tosses her a pair of clip-on
braces and tells her to put them on behind her knickers, pulls the straps hard
over her shoulders and arching her back to allow more slack in the braces she
clips them onto the front of the knickers. Her buttocks now totally exposed are
split down the middle by a thin strip of panties. She is ordered to adopt a
number of poses before the mirrors as she receives her caning, a different pose
for each stroke. She touches her toes, kneels on all fours and lies on her back
with her knees up around her ears and then stands on the end of the bed bending
over holding on to the bars, her bottom almost level with the man’s shoulders.
Some close up photos will be necessary for this sequence as detail is very
important.
Would it be possible to see photographs of models in
leotards adorned with ribbons above her bottom; perhaps a wide belt around the
waist of a body stocking/leotard and also a tutu, a short transparent skirt as
worn in ballet. I enclose some sketches, just ideas not necessarily guidelines
for your photographers.
I have had some interesting spanking experiences. I recall
one occasion out of many. For comfort I placed two cushions on the floor, and
the girl knelt face in to the bed her bottom thrust well out in tight panties.
I took a tie and passed it beneath the back of her panties pulling them up as
hard as they would go into her crotch. I then tied her hands with the same tie
behind her back. So if she moved them she would only make things more
uncomfortable by increasing the tension in the elastic. I then proceeded to
whip her out-thrust buttocks lightly but firmly with a riding crop. After about
fifteen minutes she was actually moaning with pleasure and she was visibly wet
between the lips of her pussy, her bottom-cheeks a pretty pattern of red
stripes. I applied some Vaseline to her bottom to enhance the rough sheen and
applied some to myself. Then I knelt behind her hot buttocks wrenching the
panties out of her crotch and pushed into her with my other hand gripping her
neck so as to ensure I could pull her back onto me each time I thrust into her.
I have had more spanking experiences etc and other ideas for
photo sequences. I hope you like this letter and I look forward to hearing from
you soon.
J. Ranft, London
Dear Sir,
I am writing to you as a Blushes reader on a subject
that seems to receive little attention these days but which must be of great
importance to many marriages. The subject in question is marital spanking.
Whilst Blushes deals admirably with the fantasy side of C.P.,
depicting young girls usually schoolgirls receiving their ‘just deserts’, the
popularity of the magazine probably reflects a general lack of satisfaction
amongst married men, myself included, at being unable to personally administer
a good spanking to their partners. For my part, I believe that C.P. if
delivered in moderation and without spite can be a source of mutual
satisfaction but unfortunately my wife, Nicole, does not agree. She is an
attractive, sophisticated and career-minded woman of 29 who feels it would be
unacceptably degrading and humiliating for her to allow me to spank her bottom.
My discussions with her on the subject have resulted in a hardening of her
attitude, made all the more frustrating for me by two main factors.
Firstly, she keeps herself in excellent shape — her buttocks
are well-proportioned and firm — ideal spanking material and she happily wears
clothes which I consider particularly provocative. Tightly fitting leather
trousers and skirts, sexy underwear (especially the currently fashionable
seamed stockings) and very high-heeled shoes and boots are all part of my wife’s
‘sophisticated yet sexy’ look. It seems also that she deliberately tries to
provoke my urge to spank her by ‘exhibitionist’ or flirtatious behaviour. While
(hopefully!) completely faithful to our marriage, Nicole is certainly not
averse to having her bottom fondled by other men at parties or to displaying a
stocking-top to an admirer in the pub.
The second ‘factor’ is that, due to my wife’s concern for
fitness, namely her horse-riding, self-defence and aerobics classes, she is a
woman of considerable strength and is easily capable of rebuffing any attempt I
might make to forcibly remove her panties or put her across my knee. My last
attempt resulted in her turning the tables on me completely and it was I who
ended up where she should have been! In fact, my lady wife is positively keen
to engage in the ‘Fem/Dom’ activities which usually result from my attempts to
make love to her. I suppose it is hypocritical of me to complain that I find it
humiliating to have to lick my wife’s favourite ‘bedroom-boots’ or to be made
to wear a collar and lead in order to gain access to my wife’s carefully shaved
pubis, but it’s really no joke. I do, of course, have a choice as my wife
frequently reminds me. Either I toe the line or some rather embarrassing
polaroids which I was once foolish enough to let my wife take of me might find
their way to my boss’s desk. However, I digress.
A point which may shed some light on the matter is the fact
that my wife spent her years between the ages of 12 and 18 at a private girls
school where C.P. was commonplace. My eagerness to elicit from her the details
of any C.P. she might have received at school resulted in my ‘weakness’ being
ruthlessly used against me. In order to draw from ‘Madam Nicole’ an account of
her own C.P. experiences at school, I had to clean and polish her riding-boots
and tack, hand-wash three pairs of jodhpurs and innumerable pairs of panties. I
finished up tied to an uncomfortable chair in the bedroom while my wife
recounted her story pausing only to take further polaroids of me and undress
for bed. Unfortunately for me at this point my wife decided to add some realism
to her story and I was obliged, after I had been untied, to adopt a kneeling
position in the chair doubled over the back with palms flat on the floor.
Nicole, receiving sufficient elevation from her six-inch-stiletto-heeled
thigh-boots put my head between her thighs, carefully treading on my fingers in
the process and finished the story adding a stroke or six of realism with her
riding-crop.
The crop and whipping chair have now become permanent
features of the price I pay to retain favour with my wife so Blushes offers
welcome relief to my own stinging bottom and the inaccessibility of my wife’s
expensive silk panties, or rather, their contents.
Clearly, this state of affairs is less than satisfactory to
me and I would be grateful to receive any advice that you or any readers may
have to offer on the matter.
My wife’s account of her schooldays can be the subject of
another letter if you should so request and I would be glad to discuss, by
post, any suggestions for improvement or observations you may care to make on
the foregoing. Meanwhile, I shall endure my predicament and at great personal
sacrifice try to collect more C.P. stories for the contents of a future letter.
K. J. Howard,
Middlesex.
[Poor Mr Howard — it would take a heart of stone not to
laugh at his predicament.]
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